Children have a moral obligation to help their parents live out their golden years with as much dignity as possible, once they become unable to take care of themselves. However, with 7 in 10 Americans now living paycheck to paycheck, and the cost of health insurance and medical care outpacing inflation by a factor of 2, many are wondering how they are going to fulfill their familial obligations without jeopardizing their own future. You do not have to go broke while helping your aging parents. Hopefully they have saved frugally and invested well, but frequently that isn’t the case. Decisions that need to be considered include your parents’ medical needs, their wishes, and – unfortunately – the financial capacity to meet those needs and wishes. You may have to pay for assisted living if you cannot take care of them yourself. The cost of different healthcare options vary widely, so do your research to identify ways to save money where necessary without sacrificing the dignity of the people that raised you.
Plans your parents have in place
Your parents might have a living will, so have a talk with them and see if they have any health care proxies. Ask your parents where they keep their financial documents. Tell them you want to ease the burden and help them keep up with paying the bills. Also, you do not want to take on too much of the financial responsibility. Ask your parents if they had set up any estate planning. Open communication about these issues early and often not only helps you to make better decisions regarding their care, but also prevents a lot of the drama and hurt feelings that can sometimes result from some of these decisions. Be upfront and honest about your desire to help, and also about the limitations on your ability to help.
Responsible parents discuss estate planning with their children. Most of them plan for the future; the topic is always forefront. One more thing to ask your parents is if they have long-term care insurance. Paying for nursing homes or other assisted living services is not cheap, and this type of insurance can ease the financial burden should this type of care become necessary. Encourage your parents to be very clear about their wishes for their own lives and also for what they want to leave behind.
Where will your parents live?
The majority of aging parents want to stay at home. They know their surroundings and are better able to get around without help. Spend time with your parents and see if they need someone to drive them back and forth. Research to see what community services are available in the area.
Their prices might be lower than a private service. You can pay for a package deal. Someone will deliver meals and drive your parents to and from appointments. Check with the Senior Community Services Office within the area your parents live. They will give you a price list for their services.
How to pay for assisted living
The average cost of a private room in a nursing home is pushing $80,000 per year, according to a Norton Shores Elder Law Attorney. This is cost-prohibitive for most parents. Your parents like their independence. But, their illness might prevent them from taking care of themselves. Both you and your parents can share the financial burden. Ask them how much they can afford to have someone check in on them during the days. Pay the part your parents cannot afford. It is far cheaper than going to a nursing home.
Paying less out-of-pocket expense
Ask others in the area about home care for the elderly. Someone might know of an inexpensive way to save money. Students saving up for college would work for less than what agencies would charge. They might charge $12 per hour as opposed to $18 per hour. Some organizations offer part-time home care. The staff will help your parents with medication, bathing, and cooking.
The federal government offers help if your parents do not need medical supervision. Based on a doctor’s prescription, Medicare covers a part of in-home care. To be sure of what the gov’t covers, visit Medicare.gov.
In determining what your options are, communication with your parents is the key to making responsible decisions that will preserve dignity and the integrity of your relationships. Hopefully the combined capacities of your parents’ retirement savings, Medicare insurance, health insurance, and long-term care insurance are sufficient to satisfy their needs without causing undue strain on your finances. If your parents are over 60 and do not have long-term care insurance, it may be time to consider taking out a policy. Check out the community services in the area. Many businesses and municipalities offer meal-delivery services or transportation assistance to help extend senior citizens’ independence.